That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Randomize
