yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
