News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize