Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i think i have two assholes
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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