I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
All I want is dick and wine.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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