yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
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