I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
