The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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