so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
