she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
