When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
So much rum. So many feels.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
