What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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