But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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