i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
