hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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