you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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