Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
