she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Randomize
