My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Randomize
