they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
God I need to hump something, right now.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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