I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
