..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
