and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
