she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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