In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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