Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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