oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
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