My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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