I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
