Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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