After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
