on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
