this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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