i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
