i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So much rum. So many feels.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
