well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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