do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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