She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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