Its about making memories worth repressing
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
