only if we run a train.
done.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
