This dress was meant to end up on your floor
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
