I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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