It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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