My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Come see our sink grown plant.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
