Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
You wonβt make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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