We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
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