is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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