The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Let's get the cat blown out
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
