she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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