Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
